Blog posts

The healing power of forgiveness in grief: why forgiveness is essential for your mental health.

Losing a loved one is a deeply painful experience that can leave you grappling with complex emotions. But what happens if the one you lost has hurt you? What do you do?

So amidst the sorrow, you may find ourselves facing the challenge of forgiving the person you have lost. How do you do that? You may even question why forgive at all?

While forgiveness may seem inconsequential when the person is no longer present, it holds immense importance for your own mental health and wellbeing. You need to find a final resting place in your heart for your loved one, no matter how much he or she hurt you.

Here, I will explore with you why forgiving someone who has passed away is crucial for our healing journey and how it can positively impact our mental health.

(more…) “The healing power of forgiveness in grief: why forgiveness is essential for your mental health.”

How restorative yoga helps you in your grief.

Grief is an experience that none of us is exempt. It will affect you on multiple levels, including physically, mentally, and spiritually. And it is a is a deeply personal and emotional experience.

During this challenging period, finding solace and healing can be elusive. But, if you make time for yourself, one powerful and nurturing tool that can support you is restorative yoga. This gentle practice offers a sanctuary for the body and mind, providing a safe space to release tension, promote relaxation, and cultivate inner peace.

Here, you will explore with me the transformative benefits of restorative yoga in navigating grief.

(more…) “How restorative yoga helps you in your grief.”

A journey of healing and self-discovery.

It was such an honour to be included in Free Malaysia Today (FMT) for their World Yoga Day feature. I am so excited to share with you how the practice of yoga helped me, and can help you navigate the challenging journey of grief.

Having experienced deep personal loss myself, I found solace and healing through yoga. This blog post is a TLDR version, but seriously, check out the post here.

Read the post here!

Or scroll below to check the highlights.

(more…) “A journey of healing and self-discovery.”

Taking a break can lead to breakthroughs.

In grief, I feel it’s important to take some time off to get away. I notice most people do this, sometimes a month after the funeral, sometimes even three months after. But dince my father passed away, I hadn’t had a break or getaway. In fact, the last time I was away was a week before he was hospitalised, when I went to the jungles of Gunung Ledang.

So it was with much anticipation that Eddy and I made plans to head back to Fraser’s Hill in May. The last time we spent some time there was maybe around 2014 (?) but it has been way too long.

You see, grief is a deeply personal and emotional journey that can take a toll on our mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Practising self-care becomes even more crucial during our grief journey, as it offers a way to nurture ourselves, find solace, and support our healing process.

Reflections.

In around 2014, when we visited Fraser’s, we spent a few nights at a retreat house, which is hidden away on Jalan Richmond, practically separate from the rest of the main touristy areas of the hill resort.

(more…) “Taking a break can lead to breakthroughs.”

Healing the heart: how reiki can aid the grieving process.

At some point in life, we all will lose someone (or something) we love. It’s just part of life, and it’s a part of love. Still, losing a loved one may be the most challenging experience in life. The grieving process can be overwhelming. Grief is a deeply personal journey, and finding ways to heal is essential for you.

Reiki, a gentle and non-invasive energy healing practice, can be a powerful tool in aiding the grieving process. In this blog post, I will explore the benefits reiki can bring to you in your journey in grief, providing comfort, support and a path to healing.

The grieving process and its complexities.

Grief encompasses a wide range of emotions, including sadness, anger, confusion, and even physical discomfort. Reiki offers a gentle and holistic approach to address the emotional, mental, and physical aspects of grief, promoting healing and well-being.

(more…) “Healing the heart: how reiki can aid the grieving process.”

Feeling joy in grief and overcoming guilt.

When I lost my father, it was a sorrowful and dark experience. Still, moments of joy suddenly floated up, followed by feelings of guilt. “I shouldn’t be happy!”, I would think.

My mother – who suffers from dementia – joyfully celebrated her birthday about a week after my father died. No one begrudged her that celebration, and there was a degree of innocence about it.

Why doesn’t this apply to ‘right-minded’ adults?

Grief is a complex and deeply personal journey, often associated with feelings of sadness, loss, and pain. Still it is not uncommon for us to experience moments of joy or happiness during the grieving process.

In this blog post, I hope to explore feeling joy in grief, and to address the common accompanying emotion of guilt. I hope to provide insight and strategies to help you navigate these complex emotions and find peace as you mourn.

(more…) “Feeling joy in grief and overcoming guilt.”

How to set boundaries in your grief journey.

With loss of any kind, there are things to take care off after the event. With a death in the family, you may find yourself with a never-ending list of to-dos. With a death of a parent, you may that these tasks are divided among the surviving adult children and possibly their spouses.

Yet, there may be times when you find yourself laden with new responsibilities, even before you can say ‘yes’ or ‘no’, as I myself experienced recently.

How do you deal with overstepped boundaries in a situation when everyone is grieving?

People who cross the line periodically and habitually are called ‘boundary bullies’. They disregard your personal boundaries, making you feel uncomfortable, overwhelmed, or even unsafe.

In this blog post, we’ll discuss why it’s important to identify your own boundaries, how to do it, how to establish boundaries with others, and what the outcome is for setting good boundaries in your grief journey.

(more…) “How to set boundaries in your grief journey.”

Four ways to gain clarity in your grief.

While my father was hospitalised, when we weren’t sure what the situation was – whether he would live or die – I had a surplus of time just sitting around, waiting to see the physician-in-charge or just for any update.

To be honest, this situation wasn’t new to me. My mother has been in and out of hospital countless numbers of time – her stroke, her dementia, complications from an operation, her contracting Hepatitis-C, so you would think I would be used to it.

But the truth is, no matter how many times you go through it, you never get used to it.

Grief and loss pool in your body at this time. Fear and anxiety grip us, stress and trauma tighten our hearts – emotions truly get trapped in our bodies.

The difference between this situation when my father was hospitalised to all the other situations when my mother was warded is my maturity in yoga and spiritual practice.

So here are four practices I exercised while I was in the hospital for my father. They really helped me, and I hope they help you too.

(more…) “Four ways to gain clarity in your grief.”

Impermanence and accepting change in grief.

If anything, the loss of someone or something precious to you will give you lessons on impermanence and accepting change.

In the lead-up to the hospitalisation and the death of my father, I was introduced to wisdom from several people. One of them, Pema Chödrön, stands out – although all of them really helped in my spiritual journey in grief.

I decided to write a standalone piece on the wisdom that helped me, and you can read it below:

(more…) “Impermanence and accepting change in grief.”